This is the Introduction to Healing Crisis. Some of the exercises will be placed in another post
H E A L I N G C R I S I S –
108 WAYS TO TURN CRISES INTO POSSIBILITIES –
Congratulations! You have just taken a step out of the dark and dismal landscape of crisis. There are numerous ways leading home – and this little book will show you a number of them. The fact that you are reading this shows that you believe that there may be light in the other end of the tunnel – that you are willing to take steps to come out of it – and that you recognize and acknowledge your power to do so! Then Love will come to your aid: when we take steps to heal and help ourselves, and support our inherent potential for growth and healing – the universe will support us.
Crisis happens when we have failed to nourish our spirit and soul. We have to feed ourselves spiritually ”in order to carry the weight of our life” says Ianla Vanzant. If we lose a beloved child, partner, friend or parent, and have not sustained our spirit, we will sink deep and dark, and we will have to use infinite more time and effort to heal than when we are spiritually well-nourished, and deep loss occurs: now we know that what looks like a disaster is God’s way of rocking our boat, in order to help us swim to new shores. We are given an opportunity for change. We may now see the crisis as an opener for personal and spiritual growth, a possibility for reconnecting with old and denied wounds within, and do some much-needed healing work – and we will recognize the gifts within the process: the encounter of deeply buried memories and feelings, with the ability of rejuvenating our soul.
When we have no conscious connection to our soul and spirit, what happens to us seems meaningless and cruel – or maybe we tell ourselves that this is God’s punishment because we have done something ”wrong”. And we resist, resist and resist with all our might – we resist what happened, we blame ourselves or fate or God, we cannot let it go :WE ARE RIDING THE VICTIM-WAVES.
This is a certain way to prolong the crisis, the feelings of desperation and overwhelm – because what we resist, persists.
If we are spiritually nourished, we will not habitually resist the violent emotions. We can now choose to allow them, and have faith that something good will come out of this in the end – as long as we keep our heart open and hang in there!
For me, the numerous crises in my life have been a huge help to recognize the touch of Love and meaning throughout the whole process – to acknowledge the ”Something Greater” we encounter when we dare to enter the scariest parts of our psychic basement – the dense and love-less darkness that seems to suck our life and light away. This book hopes to help you find a torch of your own true Light for those places, and heal them for good at last. I often remind myself that without the crises in my life, I would not have found that which is stronger: my own constant Source of love and healing, my Divine inner voice. Only by being tried often and hard enough will you be able to cultivate THAT within you that is stronger than the darkness .Several of the exercises in this book are ways of calling this force in us forth in the midst of desperation and overwhelm.
Bede Griffiths, in his book ”Return To The Center”, writes: ”Each man must discover this center in himself, this Ground of his being, this law of his life. It is hidden in the depths of every soul, waiting to be discovered. It is the treasure hidden in a field, the pearl of great price. It is the one thing necessary, which can satisfy all our desires, and answer all our needs…it is the original Paradise from which we all come.”
During crisis, there is a Greek choir of complaints within us: ” IT’S NO USE – IT’S TOO MUCH – I CAN’T TAKE IT – I CAN’T MAKE IT – IT’S UNFAIR – WHAT DID I DO WRONG – I’M NOT STRONG ENOUGH – WHY DID IT HAPPEN TO ME – I WILL NOT SURVIVE THIS – IF ONLY I HAD DONE X OR Y … and the resonating bass in this choir would probably go: MAYBE I DESERVE IT…
Believing in these voices will tap your strength and set you back. You need to go in with a counter-strategy: your own self-care and love. You need to tell yourself that the voices are a signal for you to start to talk lovingly to yourself: ”I love myself in this situation, exactly as it is, exactly as I am.” And then put your arms around yourself and give yourself a hug. You deserve it! It is astonishing how harsh we treat ourselves during crisis, when gentleness and understanding is really what work wonders.
IT IS OK TO FALL APART! When we are crushed, we are like a vase that has some cracks – and through those cracks, light is seeping through. New parts of us are being”en-lightened”. Forces and emotions and needs that have been held back for long time will seem to overwhelm you when they insist of being acknowledged, accepted and expressed. You might tell yourself that this is a time where strong forces are being balanced in your psyche,and give yourself tons of comfort and support while it lasts.
It is customary to feel strong pains in the body during periods of crisis – and they might just be old and denied memories and feelings. After checking it out with a physician, it is advisable to see these pains as old ”inner tapes” being re-played. It is a healing: your consciousness is at last able to receive the old encoded pain. Do not resist it – on the contrary: the more you relate TO the pain – not FROM it – the more merciful your healing process will be.
Yes – allow the pain, openly. That you are in pain, does not necessarily mean that you have done something wrong (as so many of us use to tell ourselves.)And you might feel better reminding yourself that it is not WHAT happens to you that determines the level of pain during a crisis – it is how you relate to what has happened to you.
This book shows you numerous beneficial ways of relating creatively and compassionately to yourself.
There are two different ”qualities” of crises:
1) The ones where something outside of you happens – it seems that the world ”does something” to you: loss of a loved one, loss of job, home, pets, reputation, accidents.
2) Then there is the ongoing perpetual crisis which is the result of trauma and tragic childhoods, where one had to grow up under overwhelming circumstances and with family secrets and lots of taboos: like incest, violent or alcoholic parents who might have been insane or psychotic. These crises are an effect of living in a constant state of overwhelm, and under the tremendous pressure that is created when something in a family is forced to be ”invisible”. The people surviving this often do so by spacing out or numbing themselves, barely ”hanging in there”, resorting to addictions or other forms of acting out. Quite often they end up identifying with the pain in their life: ”this is how I am.” They need the pain in order to feel alive, they tell themselves – and subconsciously attract other people to go on hurting them. Are you one of these people, you will recognize your life as a continuous process of crisis – a bit of peace(maybe) and then the good old crisis again…until you start to suspect that there may be some patterns within you that are jointly responsible for creating the agony.
And this is a huge insight: if I create my crises, I can also discreate them! And if I am a creator, it follows that I am NOT a victim – unless I choose to believe so.
Belonging to the last group: survivors of secrets, violence and incest, most of my life has been a search for the small sunny islands in muddy sharky waters. The safe way home to the sun filled garden of the heart has been to touch, in love and wonder and awareness, my own wounds, so cleverly buried and controlled within my psyche – hiding behind the demons.
I have used all the exercises in this book. Most of them have been created out from my own needs and creative and spiritual inspiration – and a few I have borrowed and added on. All of them have helped me – and they feel different, and have different healing to offer, each time I use them.
Personally, I have been tremendously helped by spiritual and mystic literature, and by books on soul-making and creativity. I have a habit of writing down quotes from these books on colored little cards, and when I am in a difficult situation ( it does not have to be a crisis, they work just as fine when I simply am under stress, too) I ask my Self to pick a card that can tell me what is most helpful to know in that situation. I then draw a card, and it is always right on!
There are two kinds of exercises in this book:
1) Exercises intending to give you possibilities for expressing the repressed and ”forbidden” psychic material. When this material is NOT expressed, it attracts strong negativity and chaos from the outside world, which mirrors the hidden inner negativity. Working like this is deep release-work – allowing, letting go, forgiving .It is learning to see and love all pieces of our soul that we in our life learned to judge and hate and condemn. The exercises allow you to do this work gently and with humor. I call them”eating your shadow.”
2) The exercises which draw forth the light, the strength, the power and peace that exist, forever unharmed, at your true center. This spiritual essence may be named differently: Source, God, Spirit, Essence, our true nature, Divinity, the Universe. I call these exercises ”connecting with Essence.”
SUGGESTIONS FOR USING THIS BOOK
One of the most helpful procedures I have done for myself when crisis (or just problems) have hit me, is to ask Source what IT wants me to know about myself in this difficult situation – ”what would be most helpful for me to know right now, in order to deal with this?” – and then draw a card from one of the many delightful divination-systems available to me. The Tarot, the I Ching, the Runes, the Kabbalah, and shamanistic divination-procedures have always given answers that have been clarifying.to the point and deeply supporting. Most important of all – the process shows me that there truly IS a Divine Source Who has my healing and growth as Its dearest goal. To start having confidence in this ”IT” has beyond doubt been my most precious gift. You might benefit from doing the same in a situation of crisis (or just a stressful one ):close your eyes, and take some time to experience yourself, here and now. Then ask yourself ”what would be most beneficial for me to do or know to help myself, right now?” then flip the pages of the book, put your finger in there and do the exercise ”IT” has chosen as the best for you right now.
May your crisis turn into a golden possibility
to reconnect with your true essence
may you be blessed in finding
what your soul needs the most to express
 Feel free to substitute God with Life, Divinity, Love, your true nature